Advise in dating
That's something you won't see on TV or in the movies, but it happens a lot. The "love hangover" was a strange occurrence for me.Mainly because when I was in college, sex was my "god." As a male, it's what I thought about morning, noon and night. If you have, you should stop and consider, "Why is that?
And the movie and TV portrayals of couples having sex before marriage never present it either.In fact, I might even like to punch myself in the nose for it. For example, I had a college sweetheart, the girl of my dreams. We totally "clicked." We waited for awhile, then, through my initiation, we started having sex. I stopped wanting to get to know her on any other level.And so it goes without saying that when I get married, I'm not going to like the idea that someone else has had his way with my wife. Do you like the idea of someone else being with your wife? And so, instead of growing closer together, we actually started drifting apart.And while something inside her is telling her it's the right thing to do, something inside the guy is telling him just the opposite, yet he proceeds. For the physical pleasure no doubt, but also, I think, for another reason: it makes him feel like a man.But there is a great irony in that, for what is manly about deceiving a woman?For me, two things happened once I had sex with a girl.
As I look back on it, I can say that they happened literally every time, although I was unaware of these dynamics at the time.
I've seen this happen with countless relationships, not just others of my own, but those of many other people.
And I think there's a reason for this, which I'll explain next.
Deep down, she doesn't really enjoy being with him. Since "girls use sex to get love, and guys use love to get sex," a couple will have sex before marriage. The guy does it because he wants it even more than the relationship itself. Now that I'm out of college and many people around me are getting married, I'm seeing it happen all the time.
Then, after the marriage, the woman has what she wants: a commitment from the man. And, because she may be harboring resentment because he had sex with her before they were married, she is now not interested in sex. The antidote: waiting for marriage to have sex will give the man a greater respect for his wife and the woman a greater respect for her husband.
If you have a girlfriend now and feel that way, think of how much stronger that feeling will be with your wife someday. That's what I mean by "sex killed my best relationships." People can relate on many different levels -- emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually.